Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

For the last few weeks, my Morning Uppers have been noticeably holiday-themed. Now that I make my way home to New York/North Jersey for Christmas Eve (a way bigger deal in our half-Italian family than Christmas Day), however, I thought it would be wise to brush up on the local dialect. Thanks to Jersey Shore, guidos and guidettes have been having a particularly zeitgeist-y moment recently and, as the above video shows, inflection is everything when dealing with Jersey girls (and guys). Safe travels, everyone! (Needless to say, if you don’t have headphones, this video is NSFW – unless you have a really awesome/Jersey boss.)

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

I think it’s safe to say the Muppets are back. Not that they ever really went anywhere, but they seem to be experiencing an upsurge in pop culture relevance recently. First there was their cover of Bohemian Rhapsody that took the Internet by storm, and now they’ve released this delightful interpretation of a classic Christmas carol, “The Carol of the Bells.” The Muppet Christmas Carol has long been one of my favorite holiday movies, so the blending of these beloved puppets and Christmas is nothing new to me. Up to this point Destiny’s Child’s version of this song had been my favorite, but Beyonce better watch out – Beaker makes for stiff competition.

I know. I know. Senator Diane Savino’s speech on the floor of the New York State Senate in support of NY’s marriage equality bill is week-old news. But we haven’t put the video up yet, and it still makes me really happy. Plus, you never know, there might be some folks out there (like the New Jersey state legislature) who haven’t yet had the pleasure, so… enjoy! :)

Happy Friday! (And listen up, Jersey!)

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

Holiday mashups seem to be all the rage this season. First there was Jezebel’s mixing of Charlie Brown’s Christmas special with the President’s address on Afghanistan that pre-empted it. Now, CBS has gotten in on the game, taking the beloved holiday classic Frosty the Snowman and replacing the dialogue with lines spoken by Barney from How I Met Your Mother to create Frosty the Inappropriate Snowman. It’s Christmas joy for grown-ups! Enjoy!

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

Last month I purchased Bob Dylan‘s 47th album, Christmas in the Heart, for my dad, who starts playing Christmas music in October and loves Dylan, for his birthday. Within hours of my father unwrapping it, however, his co-workers began sending me messages asking me what I was thinking. You see, when I saw Bob live a few years ago I couldn’t actually understand a word he sang, and his raspy voice combined with Christmas songs creates an interesting sound. It’s kind of like your favorite chain-smoking, whiskey-swilling diner waitress crooning at Christmas. Above is the first video off the album, for the song “Must Be Santa,” and the first one Dylan himself has appeared  in since 1997. Luckily, the fact that Dylan is donating all of the proceeds to charities fighting hunger makes it easier to enjoy.

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

Outside of Peanuts and cooking shows, Thanksgiving is a holiday that just doesn’t get much in the way of TV specials like Halloween or Christmas. So SNL imagined what Vincent Price, the master of horror, might come up with in terms of a Thanksgiving special. Lucy and Desi, Judy Garland and Albert Hitchcock all make appearances. It’s a little bizarre, but if your family’s Thanksgivings are more Addams Family than Leave it to Beaver, you’ll appreciate it. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Last week, Lady Gaga released her newest music video, “Bad Romance,” which instantly tore through (some) queer social circles, reinvigorating the ardent debates over whether Gaga is worthy of LGBT icon status. Meanwhile, though, it seems some in the geek world are willing to claim her after a little editing… My only complaint is the lack of Sega Genesis goodness in the video footage.

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to help ease the pain.

I had never seen When Harry Met Sally before arriving at college. I was made to pay for this sin, however, over and over again as all of the girls on my freshman hall inevitably broke up with their long distance high school boyfriends early on in the first semester. While it was the movie’s romance that helped them through a sad time, it’s interesting to see how easily the movie’s plot could have gone very, very differently.

I don’t know who came up with this list but I’ve had at least 3 of these toys. How many did you have or want?

So as some of you TNG early-adopters know, some of us here have a major hard-on for that once-brilliant televisual masterpiece known as Gossip Girl. Well, even though it’s taken a nasty tumble downhill this season (why do high school soaps insist on making the characters go to college?!), I still for some reason feel the need to keep up with it. Who knows why? Boredom? Habit? Blake Lively‘s big fake hypnotic hover-boobs? Who knows? But this week, something so shocking happened, something so horrifically, hilariously bad, that I almost spit my Gatorade clear across the room.

No, Parents Television Council, it was not the threesome between Dan, Vanessa and Hilary Duff (!!!). It was the song playing over it. Ladies and gentleman, may I present to you the worst, most ill-advised cover since my drunken college self decided to get in front of a microphone and do “Rainy Day Women”. On 4/20. In the middle of the quad. Shudder.

Won’t you come laugh through the tears with me? Oh, and T.I.? I believe this what they call grounds for a lawsuit…

Happy Thursday! (Call me, Ed Westwick!)

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

I’ve been kicking this idea around for a while of making a playlist devoted to songs in which the band references its own name within the song. I was thinking along the lines of a “meta” playlist or something. Looks like I wasn’t alone in my thinking – over at Videogum, Gabe recently made a supercut of scenes in movies in which the title of the film is spoken. Enjoy this fun little self-referential romp through movie-land!

Sometimes writing a song for someone is cute. This is not one of those times.

Nothing gets me up in the morning like the Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence. And how much better when it’s been auto-tuned…

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

The blending of the modeling world and realm of musicians is nothing new. The above video, however, takes an iconic and oft-covered song, “I Wanna Be Your Dog” by The Stooges, and uses it skewer the world of modeling. The clip is described as “a subversive take on the casting process directed by Legs’ Georgie Greville,” but mostly it’s an interesting video that makes me think about music, fashion, gender and everything in between.

Sometimes people go too far to impress others.

As the decade draws to a close, it’s fun to think back on some of the horrific fashion trends that have come and gone. What was the worst? Hard to say. There were so many bad ones, right? Is it Ugg Boots? Shutter shades? Ironic t-shirts? Leggings? Deep-V’s? Crocs? Nope, I say there’s one that towers above them all (yes, even Crocs!), because there’s nothing in my humble opinion that screams “I’m having a Jon Gosselin-style midlife crisis!” or “I just tried out for Rock of Love 5!” or “I’m a giant douchebag with a weird rhinestone tiger fetish!” quite like the sparkly, airbrushed monstrosities of Ed Hardy. Maybe I’m weird, but I just don’t understand why grown-ass people would want to pay far too much money to wear a tacky t-shirt with a bedazzled prison tattoo emblazoned across the front, but then again I’ve never tried meth. To each their own I suppose.

Apparently, however, I’m not the only one who finds this particular trend ridiculous (thank god!). For your viewing pleasure, the good folks over at Funny or Die have made a hilarious send-up of L.A. and Ed Hardy culture. Hopefully, it will brighten your Thursday morning a bit.

What are you waiting for? PRESS PLAY, BRO!!!

Oh, and Happy Thursday!

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

Sometimes we can all use some continuing education when it comes to beloved holiday traditions, or we make it to adulthood without having indulged in said traditions at all. So, in the interest of learning, I present this helpful video on how to score the greatest haul while trick-or-treating this weekend. Got any candy-collection tips you want to share with the whole class? Go ahead and enlighten us novices in the comments section below!

After 6 years of Spanish in junior high, high school and college, I still kind of suck. I can have a conversation and even could find my way around a country who’s primary language is Spanish. But after my horrible experience with a mean teacher in college, i gave up and switched to sign language. Of course right away I wanted to learn the naughty words: Bitch, Shit, Fuck, Asshole, Bullshit. This video shows that some people learn new languages to do naughty things, not just say them.

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

As a non-gamer, the online gaming world is kind of scary and bizarre to me. So I wasn’t expecting to enjoy the online comedy series The Guild. But Felicia Day, of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog fame, being the series’ creator was enough to draw the fanboy in me in. And even if I don’t get all of the inside jokes, I can still enjoy the fruits of Day’s labors, such as the above music video, which asks “Do you wanna date my avatar?” So go ahead and check it out without fear – because, as the song says, in cyberspace there’s no disease.

I went home last week and my Mom told me to clean out a box of my old toys. There were some things I couldn’t bring myself to throw out like Monkey Monkey or Mr. Wrinkles. Other toys helped give me a interesting look into how I got my warped sense of humor, but I’m glad I never got this toy. This old school toy would scare the crap out of anyone… Creepy!

I actually found this clip a couple weeks before I came around to respecting the blonde disco stick known as Lady Gaga. So stumbling across this video version of an old yearbook photo gives me mixed emotions. Do I enjoy having holes shot in her current persona? Empathize with the pain of looking back at what is essentially an old yearbook picture? Or do I just wonder how she’d pronounce Dyer Maker?

NBC used to show little vignettes which gave advice on everything and ended with “The More You Know.” I like these videos because they are the modern day versions with true advice!

Passion Party Hostess Jennifer invites you to a showcase of her wares Tonight (Thursday October 15, 2009) at our monthly Solly’s mixer. Join us.

TNG Sex Toy Party featuring Ms. Jennifer, Thursday October 15, 2009. Solly’s Tavern, 1942 11th St NW (@ U), 21+, No Cover. RSVP on Facebook.

Please note, in the video she says “tomorrow night” because the video was filmed on Wednesday. The event is indeed on Thursday.

Mornings suck. So every morning TNG brings you a fun video to ease the pain.

Sad puppy noises. They’re like my kryponite. So basically this video totally incapacitates me. Too much cuteness. It also reminds me of when my dog was but a wee pup and she was too small to climb up the stairs of our house, so she would put her front paws on the bottom step and then whip her head around and impatiently wait to be lifted to the top of stairs like the wee diva she is. In other words, enjoy the video while I’m off in the corner in the fetal position, waiting for the cuteness to wear off.

I don’t know why this freaks me out so, but I thought I’d share, although it’s kind of a Morning Creeper…

Last week, I promised you porn. So here’s some very creepy, emo, future-porn that makes me laugh, because I’m a strange, disturbed human being. Basically, designer Stefan Ulrich has made a breathing robotic body pillow that will crawl into bed with you and let you snuggle with it. I’m telling you if this puppy ever comes with oral sex capabilities, consider the human race done. Over. Obsolete.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it’s the Funktionide! Enjoy the first baby step (or baby slither rather) toward the utter annihilation of humanity as we know it.

Oh, and Happy Thursday!