Getting advice from a Dom? Be careful what you wish for.

Words, like violence, break the silence.

Straight BDSM, in my opinion, can go towards a stranger level of intensity that gay BDSM cannot, because there is that eternal distance/mystery of man vs. woman (and their never-ending clash of undisclosed motivations) involved whereas, with gay BDSM, no matter how heavy it gets, the playing field is always a little bit more (ironically) straight. Men understand other men and, in general, have a pretty good idea of how the score is going to play out.

BDSM is kind of polarizing for most folks, especially once you get into the more obscure or heavy-duty practices so I’m going to try explaining what it is exactly that makes the blood boil.

There are some new BDSM enthusiasts who believe that, in order for someone to truly dive into the lifestyle, that they must have some kind of gigantic dungeon in their basement or whatever, with gear, gadgets, and chains hanging all over the place like some porno version of Saw. It’s as if you have to have a football stadium-sized space so that you can install those expected cages, pullies, bondage tables, etc. They imagine that it gives them the proper credibility to say “Yes, I own whips and paddles and I use them.” But that’s a bunch of nonsense.

Over and over I’ve had people ask me “Who are you, exactly?” “Where did you come from?” “How did you get into BDSM?” “How did you become a pro Dom?” etc. So, before I continue to throw my opinions and advice at you and your erotic adventures, I should give you a basic idea of who I am and how I got into this whole thing.

BDSM doesn’t have to be an extreme sport.

Why do some people want the heavy duty, freaky-deaky shit? Because it turns them on. The pain stimulates pleasure for them and/or the scenario creates the embodiment of a fantasy, but all my slaves are 100% different from each other. Not all of them want lesions on their backs or welts on their asses (although many of them do). Some of my slaves just want to be lightly tied up, gently spanked, and forced to lick my boots which, although that can seem like a “weird” or kinky situation for some of those who aren’t very familiar with BDSM, isn’t very hardcore in the slightest. And that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with that if that’s what makes them happy.