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t@thenewgay.net



Recent Posts by t:

Columns, Dating and Relationships, From Lesbos With Love, Ideas »

[26 Apr 2011 | Comments Off | ]
Breaking Up and Moving On

Breaking up sucks. There’s no two ways about it. It sucks to be dumped and it’s hard to hurt the person you’ve been dating. What’s important to remember though is that if you are breaking up it’s for a reason and that as hard as it may be, you will be okay.

Dating and Relationships, From Lesbos With Love »

[11 Apr 2011 | 2 Comments | ]
Rebounding Forward

After a break-up some people cry, eat their feelings and hibernate until either they feel better and ready to move forward, or they’re dragged out of their caves by concerned friends, while other people tear up the town looking to rebound. We can argue which is healthier but since everybody’s different, I think it depends on the person as to which is the right thing to do, and sometimes a person may need to figure it out the hard way for herself which is better.

Columns, Dating and Relationships, From Lesbos With Love, Ideas »

[14 Mar 2011 | Comments Off | ]
Blind Date

First dates are always nerve-racking, especially if they are blind, or semi-blind. With the advent of the Internet we now have the ability to meet people from the comfort of our couch, but what happens when you meet for the first time in person?

Columns, From Lesbos With Love, Ideas, Sexuality »

[28 Feb 2011 | 9 Comments | ]
There’s a “B” in LGBT

When I kissed a girl for the first time, I thought I was bi. I had always dated men but when I kissed her, I knew I wasn’t kissing her in the way sorority girls do – I was into it. So I came to the logical conclusion that I was bisexual. It wasn’t until a year later after dating both men and women that I realized I was actually gay, and both bi and straight were phases.

Advice, Columns, From Lesbos With Love »

[14 Feb 2011 | One Comment | ]
Are You in Lust or Love?

My ex-girlfriend was hesitant at first to tell me she loved me because she was worried she was confusing lust with love. When she told me this, I was upset. She had already said “I love you,” and it felt like she was taking it back. I knew with all my heart that I was in love with her, and her need to define – to calculate – what she was feeling offended and confused me. I had never thought about the difference until then, but when I did I had to admit that she actually made a good point. When we first meet someone we’re really into, we want them all the time – whether it’s sexually or emotionally (talking all the time) or both – it can be easy to confuse lust with love.

Columns, Dating and Relationships, From Lesbos With Love, Ideas »

[7 Feb 2011 | 6 Comments | ]
U-Haul Syndrome

I think women fall into relationships faster than men for 2 reasons. First, we are conditioned to find a mate; nesting is in our blood. Second, women have less of a communication barrier between each other than men seem to. Combine the instinct to couple and the desire and ability to communicate openly and it’s no wonder we fall into relationships head-first.

Columns, Dating and Relationships, From Lesbos With Love, Ideas »

[24 Jan 2011 | 4 Comments | ]
Let’s Talk about Sex, Baby

The question I’ve received a lot though lately is – what is sex between women? In a straight relationship, the answer is more obvious – penetration. We all learned that in sex-ed when we put the condom on the banana. You know, after we learned about gonorrhea and before lesbian sex was conveniently nixed from the syllabus. And while it’s beginning to seep into pop culture, “I Kissed a Girl” hardly cuts it. So let’s talk about it.

Columns, From Lesbos With Love, Uncategorized »

[29 Dec 2010 | 5 Comments | ]
The Elusive Femme

If a girl doesn’t meet the stereotype of how a lesbian should “look,” i.e. if she’s more femme than butch, it can be difficult to tell her sexuality. But there are ways.

I tend to rely on a 4-point checklist, which is definitely not foolproof but generally helps me when my gaydar fails.

Columns, Dating and Relationships, From Lesbos With Love »

[13 Dec 2010 | 4 Comments | ]
How To Find Queer Friends in New Places

It’s tough to make friends in a new city, especially in your 20s.

You’re lucky if you move to a city where you have college or high school friends, or maybe a family member your age or have a job with young co-workers. Even knowing just one person can help. But if you don’t know anyone, moving can be daunting and lonely. Especially if you are in any way shy.

Columns, Film, From Lesbos With Love »

[29 Nov 2010 | 3 Comments | ]
Disney’s Odd Couple

I have to put aside sex for a week to reflect on The Jungle Book. It’s no secret that Disney injects its movies with adult themes from time to time, but The Jungle Book is truly the gayest movie I have seen in a long time. And yes, I’m using “gay” to mean gay.