Comments on: In The Ladies' Room: Dear Seat Buddy, I’m Gay.

By: Jean

Jean — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 04:20:33 +0000

Amelie, I totally hear what you are saying. Its funny because if you were single, gay or straight, it would be easier to answer that question. Like when your parents weird friends ask if you are dating anyone. Saying “no” is just an easy out for saying “no, but i’m gay.” Its really being in a relationship that makes that so hard!

To Commenter Josh – I interpreted Amelie’s comment about safety to mean that occasionally people with really extreme views get angry or hostile when confronted with one of their “enemies”. The way I, if i were a more volatile person, would react if I came face to face with Rush Limbaugh or Ann Colter. I always feel a little actual fear, actual danger, when I’m “out” in a crowd that I don’t know.

By: Josh

Josh — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 23:30:53 +0000

I enjoyed reading this but I’m curious:

How was your safety in jeopardy?

By: michael

michael — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 18:21:00 +0000

I think these are important opportunities to come out to strangers. What’s the worst that could happen? You move to another seat? I say, give people a chance to show you that you’re cool.

BTW, would it have been any different for you if the Iraq war vet and gun-lover was a woman?

I know it’s hard, and I rarely have the courage to come out to strangers in situations like this, but when I have, it’s always been rewarding.

By: Raphael

Raphael — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 17:22:57 +0000

I think that a lot of people maintain homophobic views (and cast homophobic ballots) because they assume that they never interact with gay people. Coming out to strangers (when it’s relevant) is no less important than coming out friends in family–both in terms of political progress and personal well being.

Although you can’t ignore personal safety when choosing to disclose, I’m not sure that an awkward train ride is something that should be avoided.