Stop making assumptions and accusations about a commuinity that you admittedly have little to no knowledge of. Stop blaming the trans community for your ignorance and learn things for yourself. I am not black, but I don’t expect my black brothers and sisters to teach me about their struggles….I attempt to educate myself in any way possible because it is not a minority’s responsibility to educate the majority. The belief that a person should ‘teach you’ how to be less offensive, is an example of the privilege the majority has in our society.

Finally, I would like to address what, in my mind, was the most offense element of your last comment. By stating that you don’t think trans folks will find themselves at the “adult table” implies that the cisgender queer community are the wise adults and those in the trans community, as well as the trans community as a whole are just children. How dare you. I am not a child. We are not children. DO NOT patronize us.

Oh…and I personally know one of your contributors is trans. We are right in front of you.

I’m saying that being an ally means doing more than just paying lip service. When you talk about wanting more trans participation, and advertise your events as trans inclusive, but then can’t even take the time to educate yourself well enough to have an informed conversation about trans issues, it comes off as disingenuous. When you can’t use reasonably correct terminology, it’s a red flag to trans people that they will have to preface any real discussion with a lot of Trans 101 crap that could easily have been answered by Google.

There’s nothing wrong with not being 100% on trans stuff; it’s not like any trans people were born knowing it. There is something wrong with failing to take responsibility for your own ignorance.

Why can’t you? Isn’t the entire point of being an ally being able to speak up for people who can’t (assuming you are not speaking over or at the expense of trans folk)? Cisgender people have access to spaces and discussions that trans people might not, have the privilege to be listened to where trans people might be dismissed or ignored.

Being an ally doesn’t mean you’re sitting around waiting for some benevolent trans person to explain things to you. At least 90% of what I know about transgender issues, I learned on the internet. There are advocacy groups, and blogs, and youtube channels. If you want to call yourself an ally, educate yourself.

Much as I appreciate the sentiment, given length of time that trans inclusion has been a topic kicked around on TNG, I find it somewhat disheartening that this article still bears a warning that Zack is only a “well-wisher”, can we please excuse his incorrect terminology?

It’s a small step, but should at least raise awareness…..

Also, the ability of straight trans people to marry is dependent on the state in which they were born and the state in which they are marrying. Requirements for gender identification for marriage vary by state, as does the ability to modify one’s birth certificate. Additionally, there is the risk that a heterosexual marriage involving a trans person may be found invalid by the courts. I know there was a trans woman who was denied her rights as a widow (property, etc) after the death of her husband because a judge ruled that their marriage was illegal since she was “really a man” (I can’t for the life of me remember her name to search it…).

Why should I fight DADT if we don’t support the military? Why should I condemn DOMA if we have no interest in getting married? Why should a trans person care about either, since heterosexual-identified trans people have the right to marry and fight in the military? And conversely, why should a gay man fight for a bill that supports trans rights when they are offered one that at least covers themselves.

What we need is sweeping federal legislation that eliminates the notion of gender for the granting of all rights, and provides special protections for those who do not conform to gender norms, be it same-sex attraction or the desire to transition to the other gender. This piecemeal approach is doing us as a community more harm than good, which is exactly what the straight (non-queer) majority wants.

If we are going to be one community, we need one fight.