A few things to do tonight for New Year’s Eve!

When people think of lesbian culture, the idea of sluts tends not to enter their mind. In pop culture, lesbians are by-and-large portrayed as monogamous and definitely non-slutty. Sure, you get a Tila Tequila every once and awhile; but in that case, most people realize that she’s not really your average bisexual, if she’s bisexual at all. Even though the L Word popularized the idea of “The Chart” and the fact that so many lesbians have hooked up with one another, it’s never really in a “slut” type way. It’s portrayed more as the fact that lesbians tend to be relationship-whores, which is pretty different than an actual whore.

Last summer, at a 4th of July party, a combination of alcohol and an escalating series of dares lead to my peeing on some some guy’s face in an oversized kiddie pool. The recipient of the beery splash was actually the one leading the dares, and the six or so men around me were in support. We were all naked and it was pretty late at night. If nothing had happened it would have been infinitely more surprising than any of the revelry that followed.

I’ve long thought that the only thing separating me from “hetero culture” is my lack of interest in women, whereas in mainstream gay culture it often feels as though the only thing connecting me is my affinity for dick.

A few months into coming out, it seems like being a lesbian is a tricky thing. It’s a balancing act between sending out “I’m gay” signals to other gays, being yourself (although for most of us, self-presentation is hardly static), and avoiding becoming a stereotype of yourself. In order to find peace and clarity on this serious issue of identity, I turned to the interwebs. A blog entry for therapists called, Whether you come out or not, you’re still gay, presents the six stages of coming out thusly:

He’d probably hate me saying this, but Lucas Silviera, singer for Canadian quartet The Cliks, is fast becoming the first trans man of rock and roll. Not first as in no others came before him, but first as in preeminent, most visible, or most inspiringly confident. Despite an insistence that his music is for people, not trans people, Silviera’s combination of musical chops and refusal to be closeted is setting a example that more queer musicians, of any letter on the spectrum, should follow

Well, it’s here. Another one bites the dust. 2009 is over, and so are the aughts. See below for ways to say goodbye to 2009 and hello to 2010 in the District this weekend.

The recent Washington Post article featuring TNG co-founder Zack did a decent job of charactarizing what we are trying to do with this site. However, it got one aspect wrong: that TNG is a resource for young people. The article impled that our efforts are for the Gen-Y and “Millennials” but that implication misses the mark. Two of TNG’s three co-founders are in their 30s. You don’t have to be young and just coming out to want more from live than what mainstream gay culture has to offer.

Ah, yes, the end of the year. How many “best of” lists have you leafed through as you count down to 2010? So appropriately enough, here’s my final list for 2009– your San Francisco New Year’s Eve preview. It would be near impossible for me to list everything that will happen in the city this Thursday, and frankly there are other lists that will do a better job than me. Case in point: check out Nitevibe’s Top Parties for a list of the best DJs spinning into the new year. For everything else… Check it out below.

Of the many annoying Of the many annoying things about growing up gay — isolation, prejudice, having to wait until college to experience oral sex— I consider one of the most lasting injustices to be the queer inability to relate to popular love songs. While all your friends got to swoon over the latest top 40 radio hit — say, “My Heart Will Go On” or some similar drek — you couldn’t quite get into it because it was a woman singing to a man. Or a man singing to a woman. Or any combination of genders that would eventually lead to someone’s penis going in someone’s vagina in the most hetero way possible.

Luckily, as my musical knowledge expanded I got the pleasant surprise of discovering that a lot of gay love songs did, in fact, exist. Most artists have a couple love songs in their repertoire and many artists are gay. Ergo, it is possible for the discerning queer music lover to make a mixtape this valentines day and not feel that they’re bowing to straight privilege. So in my humble opinion these are the top 17 gay love songs: Each has either a queer singer or writer, or explicitly queer content. Feel free to add some (or tell me how wrong I am) in the comment box. things about growing up gay — isolation, prejudice, having to wait until college to experience oral sex— I consider one of the most lasting injustices to be the queer inability to relate to popular love songs. While all your friends got to swoon over the latest top 40 radio hit — say, “My Heart Will Go On” or some similar drek — you couldn’t quite get into it because it was a woman singing to a man. Or a man singing to a woman. Or any combination of genders that would eventually lead to someone’s penis going in someone’s vagina in the most hetero way possible.

Luckily, as my musical knowledge expanded I got the pleasant surprise of discovering that a lot of gay love songs did, in fact, exist. Most artists have a couple love songs in their repertoire and many artists are gay. Ergo, it is possible for the discerning queer music lover to make a mixtape this valentines day and not feel that they’re bowing to straight privilege. So in my humble opinion these are the top 17 gay love songs: Each has either a queer singer or writer, or explicitly queer content. Feel free to add some (or tell me how wrong I am) in the comment box.