TNG reader John offers some advice for forward movement and organization against the gay marriage ban as a sequel to his post on reactions to the passing of Prop 8 that he submitted last week.

The passage of Prop 8 has prompted a wide range of reactions and many questions, such as: Would it have passed without African American support? The Mormons raised how much money for the Yes campaign? Seriously, the Mormons? Most importantly, though, we are all left wondering where should we go from here?

I think it’s important to state for the record that many of us are angry and that this whole episode has been incredibly disappointing, hurtful, and jarring. We are in something like a grieving stage, but we can’t get bogged down in it for too long. We do ourselves a great disservice if we squander the amount of attention that we are all paying to this right now. The question is, how do we take the energy that we are currently generating and channel it towards something productive? Now that we’re all pissed off, what do we do about it to change the status quo?

Here are some ideas:

1. Plan Ahead

There have been a lot of vocal displays of revulsion at Prop 8 since its passage. We have seen protests in the streets and editorial comments from mainstream pundits such as Keith Olbermann decrying the measure. But I suspect that Michael was not alone in wondering why Keith Olbermann and others waited until a week after the vote to stand up for what is right. Many of us were caught not paying attention until it was too late, myself included. I’m sure a lot of people were so taken with the general election that it was tough to devote much attention to Prop 8. Others were just complacent, still basking in the glory of the decision of the Supreme Court of California that we couldn’t imagine rights being taken away after couples had already started getting legally married.

Next time, let’s be ready to fight from the start. Now that we’re all paying attention, let’s continue paying attention! No more lapses into complacency, no more distractions. I don’t want to see Keith Olbermann spinning around in his chair lamenting the defeat of the next Prop 8.

2. Stay Forward-Thinking

Many of us (myself included) have been really pissed off about the effing Mormons. I mean, Mormons. Mormons are the stalwarts for traditional “one man and ONE woman” marriage? Mormons? I guess all along they really just meant that any marital arrangement is cool as long as there’s one (and only one) dude. Noted.

Though it may be satisfying for any number of reasons to blame the Mormons, what do we accomplish by trying to revoke their tax-exempt status?

I have no legal training myself, but from what I gather from people with legal backgrounds, the chances of this campaign to strip the Mormon Church of its tax-exempt status actually working is very, very slim. Now, that doesn’t necessarily mean we shouldn’t push forward with it. It may send a message that we are watching them closely and so they should be careful to adhere to the letter of the law in future forays into politicking. But if we do this, it has to be on the condition that it is merely one little facet of a broader, more comprehensive strategy. Please don’t just print out your tax exemption complaints, send them off to the IRS, and think that you’re done helping the cause. Put simply, going after the Mormons is not going to get one same-sex couple a marriage license. Not one. Furthermore, we have to be careful that we don’t walk into a trap. The Yes Campaign erroneously claimed that allowing same-sex marriages would threaten churches’ tax-exempt status if the churches refused to marry same-sex couples. It was a lie when they claimed it. Why do we want to give this lie any credence? Are we interested in winning the next campaign or not?

On a similar note, many have been tempted to blame African American turnout for the passage of Prop 8. Oy, this kills me. Read the post from Nate Silver and then come back to me and explain how Obama’s turnout machine and African Americans in particular doomed our chances of winning on Prop 8.

I think it’s clear that we need to do a better job of outreach to minority communities. It’s also clear that through protests and perhaps other methods, we have to put the Mormon Church (and many other churches – I personally have an ax to grind with the Catholic Church, so it’s not just Mormons) on notice that we’re not going to be kicked around anymore. But why haven’t I heard any ire directed towards old people? Where is the rage towards them? I think right now the generational divide is being overlooked because it’s not as emotionally satisfying to rant against old people as it is against Mormons and blacks. Whatever the reason, the generational divide is THE most important demographic factor working against us now, and with the passage of time (sorry, Grammy) it will be the most important demographic factor working in our favor.

Once we get past this grieving stage, I hope we remember that attacking African Americans and Mormons is probably less productive than reaching out to them. And to our nation’s elderly, thanks for everything, but we’re also looking forward to you riding off into the sunset and letting us get on with the important work of social progress.

3. Organize, Organize, Organize… oh, and do it at the grassroots

We were out-organized in this campaign. The energy at the grassroots was on the Yes side. Many of the grassroots workers on the Yes side were recruited from the Mormon ranks (here I go talking about fricking Mormons again), with a goal of erecting a million “Yes” yard signs.

While yard signs do not by themselves win an election, they are a good indicator of which side has more grassroots energy. If Obama’s victories over Hillary Clinton and John McCain should have taught us anything, it’s that the side that is organized at the grassroots is the side that wins. Next time, let’s out-organize them and a 4% loss can turn into a win. I concur wholeheartedly with those who desire a new gay activism to address the realities of campaigning in the twenty-first century.

4. Message Consistency and Smart Framing of the Issue

How on earth did we allow the Yes campaign to make this a referendum on sex education in kindergarten and churches’ rights? What about us? What about our rights? What about our families? From what I gather, the No on 8 campaign completely failed to combat these ridiculous issue frames being pushed by the Yes campaign. One volunteer on the No campaign, perhaps representative of the whole campaign and perhaps n
ot, was even told not to say the word “gay” when phone banking.

You’ve got to be kidding me. If we’re too defensive and scared to even discuss this issue on our own terms, how can we expect others to support us? Let’s take another lesson from Obama: he branded himself as the candidate of change from the first day of his campaign to the last day when he was elected. Hillary and McCain jumped from message to message every other day, and guess what? Their campaigns were completely incoherent. Let’s be strong and coherent. Let’s speak from our hearts. Maybe once we do that, we will have a greater impact on the hearts and minds of others.

5. Leadership

This is the most daunting challenge, to my mind. We really need leaders who can set a tone that makes our efforts successful. All of the factors of an effective campaign that I listed above demand disciplined, steady leadership to guide its execution. It worries me that our reaction to this setback will be to flood the coffers of organizations such as HRC with lots and lots of money without ever holding them accountable for their share of the blame for the failure of Prop 8. When a political party fails, we get to democratically hold them accountable and try new leadership, e.g., “Thanks for everything, John Kerry. We’re going to give Barack a shot this time.” I don’t mean to unfairly target HRC or any individual organization for this loss, but I also find it troubling that we have no way of knowing how effective our leaders are. Tell me, with apologies to Joe Solmonese, who is the leader of the gay rights movement? We need to know who our leaders are and hold them accountable for their performance, and not simply point fingers at Mormons, African Americans, the elderly, and whomever else we might like to blame. I am very concerned that we have forgotten to look inward and see what we can do differently for the next campaign. We have far more control over ourselves than we do over others, right? So, what can we do more effectively?

Now, I don’t pretend to know how to actually implement any of these ideas, but I’m certain that we have our work cut out for us. Given the importance of the task at hand, I hope we come out of this defeat with a renewed focus and sense of purpose. We need to quickly pivot from Prop 8 and start looking forward again.

Editor’s Note: Come out to the TNG “Ban Marriage” party tonight to discuss these and other strategies with members of your community.