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29 August 2008, 8:50 pm 75 Comments

Commentary: Where Is Our Anger?


This post was submitted by Chris Farris, resident of Adams Morgan, DC lawyer and co-founder of Crack.


My friend, Todd, was recently walking back from a Saturday night at the bars with two other friends when they were jumped and savagely beaten by six guys. The victims were gay. They did not provoke. They did not incite. They were on a public street in a busy neighborhood of Adams-Morgan (less than ½ a block off of 18th Street). My friend was beaten so badly that he has little recollection beyond the first punch, and he did not wake up until many hours later in the hospital. He has relied on witnesses to tell him how brutal the beating was and the fact that the word “fags” repeatedly flew from the mouths of the attackers.

The pictures you see were taken shortly after Todd was released from the hospital. If you look below his right eye, you can see the tread marks from the shoe of one of the attackers. In my mind, they demonstrate that this was more than a bashing; it was an attempted murder.

This is not the first incident that I have heard about where gays have been targeted for beatings in the Dupont/Logan/Adams-Morgan/U Street areas. In fact, it seems that over the past 6-12 months, these incidents are becoming increasingly common. Some of these beatings are classified (even by the victims) as muggings, but the gratuitous violence that accompanies the cooperative victim’s turning over of a few dollars makes it clear that these are bashings that happen to include the taking of some money. Since starting to write this piece, I learned of another incident that occurred just over a week ago where 3 attackers bashed 2 guys at 14th and P, calling them fags during the beating.

The police reaction to the incident involving my friend is, sadly, what you might expect: half-hearted updates from the investigators, and no arrests. While DC has a Gay and Lesbian Liaison Unit (GLLU), the police assigned to investigate the attack have little connection or, it seems, respect for the GLLU. As Todd put it, “The GLLU was involved in my case at the beginning. And although they were polite and offered to help, it was made very clear to me by the officer in charge that they were not in charge of the case and any dealings must go through them and not the GLLU. Meanwhile, I have been given incorrect info from both units [and] experienced excuses for delays.”

The police have stated that they are surprised to see a hate-crime like this in our neighborhood, contrary to everything I have heard over the past year or so. And in an interview with Metro Weekly, a police officer offered very helpful advice on how to prevent these things (since it is obviously our job to prevent getting bashed): (1) don’t walk alone at night (my friend was with two other friends), (2) stay in busy, well-lit areas (they were half a block off of 18th Street in one of the busiest neighborhoods around), and (3) don’t provoke (seriously, are you kidding me with this? Do the police think the victims dared to get beaten? The only “provocation” that occurred was when Todd and his friends asked why they were being called fags).

When I was in college in the late 80s, there was a rash of gay-bashings in and around William & Mary that were horrifying to say the least. One incident resulted in the murders of a lesbian student couple on the Colonial Parkway. But the late 80s in Southern Virginia were a different time and place altogether-–we had very few out gay people to carry the cause, the religious right was basically being led by President Reagan out of the White House in a massive AIDS-inspired anti-gay fervor, and no one other than the few of us who connected with each other spoke of the alarming trend in beatings (there was no internet, of course-–no easy way to connect in a closeted time). We were scared and frustrated–-and no one with authority would listen to us.

I noticed a welcome change in the early- to mid-90s, when Rehoboth Beach experienced a similar and equally alarming string of gay-bashings (sometimes involving baseball bats and tire irons). At that time, Rehoboth cars were plastered with the “soft” message of “Keep Rehoboth a Family Town”, making it clear that the local folks wanted the gays to go away. Again, we were scared and frustrated, but we soon found an ally–-Rehoboth inadvertently hired a very open-minded Chief of Police. He recognized what was happening, immediately met with gay community members in a sincere outreach effort, and adopted a “no-tolerance” policy against any abuse of gay visitors to Rehoboth. The change was immediate and palpable and helped create the inclusive, friendly, accepting Rehoboth of today.

And now… where is our anger? Where is our police department? How can this be happening in our own neighborhood, a neighborhood I have lived in and loved for 16 years? Why aren’t we more outraged? I refuse to sit back and be terrorized in my own neighborhood because I am gay – to be afraid to walk down my block, to visit my friends, to go to a bar, or to see a concert. I want action. I want my sense of safety back.

One way to wake up local officials – and, frankly, ourselves – is to document gay-bashings (even those some call “muggings”) so that we can all see what is happening. We need to list all of the bashings that have occurred in the past year or so, with locations and outcomes, to we can demonstrate that the problem is real and that the problem is urgent.

Please provide your comments on incidents you are aware of , or people we can contact with information, and we will begin this process of documentation, which will hopefully lead to attention from community leaders who can act to reduce these bashings.

There are two ways you can provide us with documentation of your incidents. You can either post them in the comments section, or you can email us at stophate@thenewgay.net.

I recognize that some people may not want to come forward or be publicly identified as a victim. That is understandable. The documentation of these incidents can be anonymous as long as we are certain that they are real.

Please provide your comments on incidents you are aware of, or people we can contact with information, and we will begin this process of documentation, which will hopefully lead to attention from community leaders who can act to reduce these bashings.

Contact MPD’s Gay and Lesbian Liaison Unit

Contact the Mayor’s Office

Contact your city council representative


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75 Comments »

  • Thais said:

    This is horrible!!! Desgusting, who they think they are to beat for nothing!!!! Here in Brazil we have a group named as SKINS HEAD, they attack gays too without a reason!!! It´s something that it should not exist!!!!The government should do something about it (I think). Bye Bye

  • Ben43 said:

    Learning to defend yourself is vital. At some point you may have to protect yourself or someone you care about. On August 8th TNG posted a video demonstrating some pretty good self-defense techniques. It is worth another look.

    One good place to train in mixed martial arts is Yamasaki in Rockville:

    http://www.grappling.com/index.asp

    Yamasaki has locations in MD, DC, VA & NJ. Below are info and links to the DC & MD gyms:

    DC:
    Tenley Sport & Health Club
    4000 Wisconsin Avenue, NW
    Washington, DC 20016
    BJJ info 301-770-0969
    Thai-Boxing Info 240-304-1416
    Website: http://bjjdc.com/

    MD:
    5609 Fishers Ln. Suite 6A and 7A
    Rockville, MD 20852
    phone: 301-770-0969
    fax: 301-770-7781
    Website: http://www.grappling.com/index.asp

    Another good place in DC…

    Downtown Boxing
    917 M Street, NW
    (202) 332 012
    http://downtownboxing.com/

  • Anonymous said:

    Wow, thanks for posting about this- it is not okay, and I think both the police and the community are complacent.

    Can we tell from this web site:

    http://crimemap.dc.gov/presentation/query.asp

    If these crimes are being captured, and is there a case to call a community meeting with police leaders?

  • Rob said:

    Adams Morgan on a weekend night is full of drunk asshole straight boys who drive in from the suburbs, get drunk, and then get angry because because they can’t get laid.
    That neighborhood was very cool a few years ago but now I avoid it like the plague — not just because of the potential for violence, but because it’s full of loud, obnoxious dorks.
    A good male friend of mine (who is straight) was just walking down 18th Street w/ his girlfriend and a drunk guy ran up and punched him in the face — no words exchanged or anything.
    My advice is to stay away from the weekend dorkapallooza, and if you have to walk around there, get some pepper spray — it stops fucktards in their tracks.

  • Anonymous said:

    First let me say I am horrified at the attack, and wish you a speedy recovery. I think the “provocation” aspect of the Police Officers comments are taken out of context. I don’t believe the officer was commenting on your behavior be outwardly gay or not. I think rather the officer was commenting on ones interaction with individuals. Regarding the delays…maybe you should be more specific, did the officers blatantly delay reporting or were there simply operational reasons for a delay?

  • Tyrone said:

    I am sorry to hear that this happened and it is important that that we as a community continue to share these stories. I think that your project to document these crimes is a good idea. It does not leave it solely in the hands of the officials to do so.

    Maybe it is the weekend, but I wonder why there are only a few comments on this post???

  • Anonymous said:

    Adams Morgan on a weekend night is full of drunk asshole straight boys who drive in from the suburbs

    Or over from the ‘hood.

  • Tony Scalia said:

    Fortunately, we can now carry guns in the District. Arm yourselves, queers, and fight back with deadly force.

  • Justin said:

    Thank you for bringing this to the attention of us and the authorities. We do have to be aware, and we do have to act. this type of intolerance and unjustified discrimination is unacceptable and all too often tolerated. Chris, thanks for posting and being so active. You are so right in asking where our anger is. We too, as a gay community, have become complacent and lazy. Others’ intolerance of other should be met with intolerance of the lack of laws and rights that protect us.

  • Eric said:

    I think these photos are proof we should all start carrying fire arms. I’m not one to recommend violence, but if just one of these the three attackees had had a gun (and properly knew how to use it) maybe it would have deterred the thugs a little.

    Well wishes for your friends recovery. This is truly outrageous.

  • Ben43 said:

    Three Gay men are ambushed by six bigots and there is no outrage.

    The DC Gay media gave the August 2006 Robert Wone murder on Swann Street two years of attention but is comparably silent on the matter of this outrageous attack and on the complex subject of anti-Gay violence in general. A crime blotter type mention is neither “coverage” nor helpful (if even noticed) to any of the community “Gay” media purports to serve.

    While the Wone murder was the subject of a recent Blade editorial the subject of ongoing anti-Gay violence in general has been overlooked. As the dominant Gay newspaper in the city with the widest readership I’d like to see The Blade consistently devote time and space to reporting on crime issues such as:

    1) anti-Gay attacks

    2) weapons laws and legislation

    3) weapons instruction and training facilities (such as firing ranges)

    4) self-defense instruction and techniques; mixed martial arts schools

    5) profiles of victims willing to share their stories (names can easily be withheld)

    6) how to respond to an attack or a threat as it happens

    7) what to do immediately after an attack

    8) local hospital emergency room contact info

    9) local organizations that assist with law enforcement, prosecution and legal issues (I didn’t even know what the “GLLU” is until I saw the link)

    10) counseling resources for post traumatic stress

    This is vital information I have not seen published anywhere but could be made easily available in a regular column in print and/or online. On a purely selfish level The Blade could develop a new revenue stream of ad sales related to the crime “industry”: mixed martial arts schools, lawyers, doctors, counselors, etc.

    I am at a loss contemplating the apparent apathy with which these attacks are met by the authorities, the mainstream media and our own “community”. What is “Gay Culture” if nothing more than a network of bars, clubs and parties? What is “Gay Community” if we cannot help, serve and protect our own?

    We continue to suffer these attacks year after year, decade after decade and no one (we hear of) defends themselves, no one really cares and nothing really changes. Anti-Gay violence will continue unabated. Maybe it’s time we conquer that learning curve. Let’s make sure the infrastructure of resources we need to defend ourselves exists and is available.

    Where is our anger? Hell, where is our self-respect?

  • Anonymous said:

    Back in the 80′s and early 90′s, the gay communities in New York and San Francisco sent out patrols called the Pink Panthers to protect us from gay bashing. They carried heavy police flashlights and baseball bats for protection and patrolled gay areas in groups. Perhaps it’s time to form this type of defense squad again. Sometimes just the threat of these patrols can prevent violence. I’m sick about this kind of attack and think we need to do something as a community and not just start arming ourselves individually. I’m not necessarily anti-gun, but it isn’t realistic to think we’re all going to learn to use them and pack a gun every time we stop at Nellie’s for a cocktail.

  • Kelly said:

    I lived in Adams Morgan for about 2.5 years, right on Mintwood, and I saw things I was dumbfounded at all the time. Anti-gay teens who clearly were not afraid to speak their mind, starting trouble with seemingly innocent people. I always saw all kinds of provocation and it was never from us – but always from the kids.

    The police need to step up and see this issue for what it is. This saddens me and makes me scared for my friends who feel safe after walking home from a bar. It can happen anywhere, any time.

  • Anonymous said:

    I suggest we hold a gay-in in Adams Morgan on a Saturday night. Meaning: a march of hugging, kissing, loving, strident queers. A “take back the night” sort of thing. This intolerance is unacceptable, yet, pretty damn acceptable to the general population of the surrounding areas as well as to the majority (i.e. those with clout) of the police force. I think the key here is numbers, in regards to safety and in order to make a strong statement. Posting documented evidence of such blatent violence on this blog is a brave start to what should be the beginning of an anti-hate, pro-acceptance campaign. I believe such a bold statement is something the DC queer community is more than capable of achieving. Let’s do it! In cases of discrimination one must consider the logical conclusion: the willful death of the “other.” So we must fight for our lives, once again.

  • Anonymous said:

    “full of drunk asshole straight boys who drive in from the suburbs, get drunk, and then get angry because because they can’t get laid.”

    If you think yuppie white boys in striped shirts are doing the beatings you are mistaken.

  • Anonymous said:

    I live a 1/2 block of 18th & Columbia and am appalled at the utter lack of policing of this neighborhood on Friday and Saturday nights. The police really need to step it up and show more of a presence and crack down on the public drunkenness and loud activity that just encourages an escalation into violence and other over-agressive behaviors.

  • Anonymous said:

    This is ridiculous and has to stop! A friend of mine was recently beaten at 13 and V St. Nw and left in an alley. The assailants were the same young thugs that have been roaming and wilding in the city all summer. I am outraged and since it seems that there is little being done about I am buying myself a taser.

  • Jeremy said:

    “If you think yuppie white boys in striped shirts are doing the beatings you are mistaken.”

    If your racist sensibilities were offended, rest assured that “suburban” doesn’t necessarily mean white or yuppie around here.

  • douglas said:

    Wait before you go gun shopping. Its still not legal to pack heat on the streets of DC. The new regulations currently only protect your right to keep a hand gun at home.

    But here’s a group that advocates queers arming themselves: http://www.pinkpistols.org

  • Anonymous said:

    Rob,

    You summed it up perfectly. I no longer frequent the area either on the weekends. Unfortunately, you still have people who swear that Adams Morgan is the safest place on weekend nights and incidents like this are just “once in a while”.

    Any area that you can be attacked at random, whether you are gay or straight is an area to be avoided at all costs.

  • Fight back! said:

    I agree that it is sometimes necessary to go to the police in situations like this given the current realities, but I think that our long-term strategy in the queer community should be to oppose the prison industrial complex. We should be searching for community-based strategies to resist anti-queer violence that do not strengthen a broader criminal justice system which is hostile to queers and poor folks, people of color, etc.

    We should also explore organizing strategies that empower our community collectively. Support services are essential, but I think that we should also be developing strategies that are not solely focused on individualizing this problem — like focusing only on promoting social service agencies and carrying weapons on an individual level. We need community empowerment that is lead by and for queer folks.

    For more on this line of thinking, please visit http://www.CriticalResistance.org, http://www.incite-national.org, http://prisonactivist.org/?q=taxonomy_menu/9/59/90, http://www.transformingjustice.org

  • PeteinDC said:

    This incident and the very recent one just outside of Playbill clearly demonstrates the upswing in hate crimes against the queer community. It’s time to resist the violence and hate. I agree with the previous poster, let’s organize as a community.

    I think we need to take back these communities. We need to reach out to residents and business owners and have a visible presence. We cannot let fear rule our lives!

    I am interesting in helping to form a GLBTQ Community Activist Working Group. Please contact me if interested. I will soon be placing a meeting announcement on my blog.

    thanks,
    Pete

  • Anonymous said:

    Teenage dinge aren’t driving in from the suburbs, honey. They live there.

  • Adrian Fenty said:

    racist sensibilities were offended

    Lay off the PC bullshit. That anonymous’ point is valid.

  • Mark said:

    My former boyfriend were harassed, stalked and had our lives threatened last year by two black males who appeared to be around age 15. Knowing that a waiter at Annie's Steakhouse around the corner had recently been murdered by a teenaged black male I was not going to put up with this.

    When it was clear ignoring them would not work I confronted them. Things became very tense very fast but I refused to back down. Yelling back and walking toward them I let them know they picked the wrong faggot to mess with. I didn't survive cancer or a lifetime of homophobia to put up with this bullshit. I was not scared of them and they could see that. After a tense prolonged exchange they left us alone.

    We were on R Street between 16th & 17th Streets in broad daylight. Not one gay man passing by came to our aid or even used their cell phone to call the police. That is disgusting.

    We are easy prey. Get over your self-loathing and start defending yourselves and each other. Now.

  • Jeremy said:

    “Lay off the PC bullshit. That anonymous’ point is valid.”

    Unprovoked race-bating? That’s neither valid nor helpful.

    “Adams Morgan on a weekend night is full of drunk asshole straight boys who drive in from the suburbs, get drunk, and then get angry because because they can’t get laid.
    That neighborhood was very cool a few years ago but now I avoid it like the plague — not just because of the potential for violence, but because it’s full of loud, obnoxious dorks.

    Bolding mine. Now what sense did his response make?

  • Michael said:

    Hey, people… Let’s keep this conversation focused on the problem of hate crimes against gays.

    It’s a well known fact that there are pockets of high-crime areas in and around Adams Morgan. 20th and Kalorama is one, and the intersection of Kalorama and Ontario is another. A former City Paper employee was recently shot on Euclid street between 16th and 17th.

    The perps are not the same people who go out and get drunk on 18th street. Instead, they are local kids and/or gang members who live in/around Columbia Heights and prey on all the drunk-tards stumbling back to their cars parked in these trouble spots.

    A few years ago, I witnessed a mugging in AdMo and then, with my roommate on our bikes, followed one of the perps back to his apartment complex at 14th and Fairmont Streets, in Columbia Heights. My friend chased the perp while I was on my cell phone with MPD/911 trying to get a squad car to come out and arrest the kid. They never came and he slipped into the building.

    I think that the continued gentrification of historically low-income areas is causing a lot of friction between those who’ve been living there and the new residents, many of whom are gay “pioneers” who are more willing to take chances in “up and coming” neighborhoods.

    Increased police surveillance will do nothing to address the root of the problem, which is the sense of hopelessness that many urban youth are feeling. The solution starts in their houses and schools. It includes getting them involved in community events and summer work programs.

    Just increasing police in one area will result in the troublemakers moving to another corner to harass/mug/attack other folks.

    Maybe we need more queers giving presentations in DCPS auditoriums, to put human faces on the people that these kids are seemingly so likely to attack.

    What else can we do? Other ideas?

  • Mark said:

    While we quibble over PC bullshit gay men are getting attacked in the streets. Heaven forbid we, the most hated minority in the world, should offend anyone or, worse, complain to the authorities. Better we just argue amongst ourselves.

    It is not race baiting to describe identified suspects and assailants, like the 6 black guys who, in fact, attacked 3 white gays in Adams Morgan.

    Grow a pair.

  • QstreetDC said:

    Jeremy,
    You are an idiot. Your painful PC-Uber-Alles routine is so tired. The Stockholm Syndrome nonsense is just that. Pretending to be offended to establish your liberal racist credentials is self serving noise. You are aiding the perpetrators you chump. You are a collaborator. Now please let those trying to deal with the urgency and gravity of this problem do so. Listen to Obama’s speeches. The days of white liberal carte-blanche for inner city violence are over. If you won’t help, at least shut up.

  • muddiboots said:

    Michael,

    I think you hit the nail on the head there. While I don’t think all of this is coming from Columbia Heights, and while there definitely are visible QPOC teens in the neighborhood around 14th and Fairmont (I live there), there have been comments from some of the newer neighborhood residents for the last year and a half about incidents that may have been gay-bashing. For a quick example, search for the rock-throwing article on DCist from last summer.

    It’s difficult to say how much of the stuff in Columbia Heights is really gay-bashing; I had gravel thrown at me by a bunch of teenage boys about 6 months ago, but no slurs came with it. (They also fled when I turned to confront them, and I’m not the most imposing person.) I have witnessed attacks that were clearly race-inspired, so it’s not just gay-bashing going on.

    While making ourselves seem tougher may help prevent more attacks, getting involved with the neighborhood kids so they don’t see us as “other” may do more. If the “fag” down the street is also little Sandra’s tutor, her big brother probably wouldn’t let his friends beat him up. And hopefully the lesson that not all white/gay people just want to kick his friends out of their homes so that they can move in would also come through.

    As far as the police go though, I’d say definitely report the crimes, because the more reports there are, the more funding and support the MPD gets to counteract those crimes. But I’d also say don’t depend on them to protect you; if it’s not a homicide, you’re probably not their priority. Sucks, but that seems to be how they work.

  • Jeremy said:

    You’re right. A war between gays and blacks is the most valid and constructive context in which to discuss this issue. Sorry for the derail.

  • Steve said:

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but we’ve seen gay bashings in DC both from young black teenagers in Adams Morgan and from white college students in Georgetown.

  • dcpeg said:

    I feel so sorry for Todd, you and your friends. My younger brother was a “gay pioneer” in Chicago almost 40 years ago and told harrowing stories that made me wonder why he wanted to live there. Thankfully he and his partner survived.

    I think jealousy and fear play roles in gay-bashers’ minds. And let’s not forget alcohol that makes even dimwits think they’re better than everyone else.

    My advice is to always walk with your head held high, confident that you can take out anyone who dares to approach you! It has helped me, a straight woman, survive too many years of leering construction workers and wishful lotharios. Two stalkers, too!!

  • Michael said:

    Someone asked above if the DC crime mapping site tracks these crimes. I did a little poking around and I can’t find any data flag that indicates a hate crime of any sort.

    Having MPD’s database expanded to include a field where a hate crime can be indicated would be one small step in improving the tracking of these incidents.

  • Ben43 said:

    Information on hate crime tracking is posted at the FBI Hate Crime Statistics home page. The latest year I found was 2006.

    Here is the link:

    http://www.fbi.gov/ucr/hc2006/

  • Anonymous said:

    Now what sense did his response make?

    “If you think yuppie white boys in striped shirts are doing the beatings you are mistaken.”

    Perfect sense.

  • Anonymous said:

    Not to create any controversy here, but although I’ve never been physicall attacked (thank God), I’ve been verbally assaulted numerous times just walking in my neighborhood. And it’s always by the same crowd…African American juvenile deliquents. This isn’t race baiting or racial profiling, but my own personal experience. They clearly have a bone to pick with those of us “gentrifying” their neighborhood, but that doesn’t give them a right or a valid reason to attack their own neighbors. I think it stems largely from poor parenting, as their parents likely harbor the same homophobic and racist tendencies as their children. Increased housing assistance and government programs aren’t going to solve this problem. Harsh laws that harshly punish criminals like these will…as will increased police surveillance, increased police response time and a change in attitude not just from gay people but citizens in general that any form of harassment, be it verbal or physical, shouldn’t be tolerated. When you let bullies get away with being bullies, it only empowers and enables their continued behavior. It’s time for everyone to stand up for themselves and let these thugs know that “faggots” can and will defend themselves.

  • Michael said:

    Zack shared with us recently some harassment that he and his boyfriend experienced recently in Adams Morgan.

    Homos, Hold Hands: Some Words in Defense of PDA

  • Juanita de Talmas said:

    rest assured that “suburban” doesn’t necessarily mean white or yuppie around here.

    I’m sure it doesn’t, but I’m also sure the original comment wasn’t referring to “suburbanites” driving in from PG County. It was quite clear what his implication was. It’s interesting that you were so quick to plant the “racist” label on someone who pointed this implication out, yet remained silent on the implied racism of the original post.

  • Greg Fletcher-Marzullo said:

    I find it interesting that there’s been little rejection of the comments for queer people to carry guns, etc. I’m all for self-defense (thanks to all for the classes resources!), and I don’t rule out the possibility of my leveling a gun at some attacker’s head in the heat of the moment – hence one of the many reasons I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to have one.

    Yes, our rage is powerful. Yes, it’s an incredible catalyst that lights the fires of change. No, that doesn’t mean we get to disassemble the master’s house with his tools.

    The longer-term goal is about changing culture, not just stopping the most recent incarnation of hatred. In order to do that, I think we have to look beyond our immediate needs and think of how we can best affect true change in the longterm.

    This is a really powerful post and discussion. Thanks to everyone involved.

  • Jeremy said:

    It’s interesting that you were so quick to plant the “racist” label on someone who pointed this implication out, yet remained silent on the implied racism of the original post.

    Is it that interesting? Whatever the implication was it wasn’t an attempt to lead us down the road I was trying to stave off with my first response. Once you try to paint yourself as an exclusively white group of encroaching queens squealing about how the blacks are out to get you then there goes any sympathy you might have had coming.

  • muddiboots said:

    …Many of you are advocating various forms of self defense here, whether through physically fighting or getting increased police surveillance. Am I the only one who’s interested in reaching out and befriending our neighbors?

    It’s much easier to attack a stereotype, whether gay or black.

    Also – Chris, thanks for coming forward with this story. I hope Todd and your other friends heal quickly and that the police start stepping up. When I’ve had problems with police reticence in the past, Councilmember Graham has been helpful in putting pressure on the local district. His email is jim@grahamwone.com. Also, I met the local brass at a recent neighborhood commission meeting. The 3rd District is overseen by Commander Kucik, and you can reach him at george.kucik@dc.gov; you can also reach Police Chief Lanier at cathy.lanier@dc.gov.

  • Anonymous said:

    Am I the only one who’s interested in reaching out and befriending our neighbors?

    I’m only interested in reaching out and befriending the civilized ones.

  • melvin said:

    Once you try to paint yourself as an exclusively white group of encroaching queens squealing about how the blacks are out to get you

    Perhaps that is your own biases coming through. I am African-American AND gay and I know full well it doesn’t boil down to blacks v. gays

  • Jeremy said:

    I know that too, that was my point.

  • Mark said:

    Befriending the neighbors? How white of you. Your neighbors may not want your bourgeois detente, especially those perpetrating these crimes. They may not care about you at all…which is why some are perpetrating these crimes.

    It is unwise to respond to ongoing violence by making friends. You could have done that already, long ago and on your own time. You don’t have to wait until you are living in fear and forced to exploit your working class neighbors of color for a cease fire. Because, you know, that would be transparently racist manipulation…on both sides.

    This is a legal problem and requires a legal solution. You cannot change the way people think or attempt to appease them…nor should you. The solution here is with law enforcement and self-defense.

    The first real task is to get organized and make some changes in how the police handle these crimes. After that learn to defend yourself.

    Kumbaya.

  • Anonymous said:

    For christ sake JUST FIGHT ALREADY.

    Are you always gonna be on the schoolyard playground getting your ass kicked for the rest of your life?!

    Damn sissies.

  • Anonymous said:

    “For christ sake JUST FIGHT ALREADY.”

    No one picks a fight when they are outnumbered. I’m not gay or a victim of violence but my guess is when attackers sense the upper hand they go on the attack for kicks because they see little downside of “losing”

  • Greg Fletcher-Marzullo said:

    I’m curious – what is your definition of “just fight already”? Is this just physical retaliation – or is there more?

  • Anonymous said:

    Calling someone a racist is not ‘trying to stave off’ a discussion, it is an attempt to stifle it. And rather than move the conversation away from race, your comment ensured that race became the focus.

  • Anonymous said:

    I actually spoke to the police about this issue several weeks ago. Their response, in an email, was that they didn’t believe that hate crime “numbers were up,” but that they’d check into it. When asked why gays (and more particularly gay men) are the targets of the vast majority of hate crimes in the District, they responded that they didn’t think things were worse here than elsewhere, but that we have better reporting.

    So, those of us concerned about this shouldn’t expect much from the police without some significant pushback from our side. And, since race and class has been raised, a group of friends and I were verbally harassed several weeks ago by a car full of black guys driving in from Maryland. They were in a Lincoln Navigator, which I am pretty sure cost a bit more than either the 2001 Oldsmobile Allero I drove at the time or the Ford Escape I just bought.

    I love all of the reverse assumptions about race and class that gays make to excuse this kind bullshit.

  • Anonymous said:

    Anyone want to organize a Rally/Walk to demonstrate our fearlessness and inability to take this kind of bigotry and hatred any longer? Adams Morgan this Saturday walk down 18th Street at midnight?

  • Zack said:

    Regarding the above comment: I am in the beginning stages of planning such a rally, though it would most likely be next weekend. Anyone interested in organizing may email stophate@thenewgay.net

  • Jordan said:

    I agree completely with Fight back!

    Fight back! said…

    I agree that it is sometimes necessary to go to the police in situations like this given the current realities, but I think that our long-term strategy in the queer community should be to oppose the prison industrial complex. We should be searching for community-based strategies to resist anti-queer violence that do not strengthen a broader criminal justice system which is hostile to queers and poor folks, people of color, etc.

    We should also explore organizing strategies that empower our community collectively. Support services are essential, but I think that we should also be developing strategies that are not solely focused on individualizing this problem — like focusing only on promoting social service agencies and carrying weapons on an individual level. We need community empowerment that is lead by and for queer folks.

    For more on this line of thinking, please visit http://www.CriticalResistance.org, http://www.incite-national.org, http://prisonactivist.org/?q=taxonomy_menu/9/59/90, http://www.transformingjustice.org

  • PeteinDC said:

    I and a few others will be having the first meeting of a GLBT anti-violence working group Monday evening at the DC Center. You can see my blog for a few more details.

    I hope this working group will both help Zack with his idea for an event, and continue a much more long-term effort to stem the tide of violence in the community. We also hope to increase education on homophobia and the issues of hate crimes.

  • Sarah said:

    This is how DC police operates. They blame the victim, usually for the crime of daring to be in a public space, take the report and then do nothing.

    They do this no matter the crime or the victim. It is very equitable.

    Gay bashing is a serious crime and a hate crime, but so is your run of the mill murder that the DC police routinely fail to do anything about. They are incompetent.

    Don’t make this a gay issue, make this a resident of DC issue because no matter our sexual orientation, race or gender, we are all sick of living in fear.

  • ksu499 said:

    Reading the descriptions of the responses of MPD makes me think of the famous quote by Marion Barry, “DC has a really low crime rate, if you don’t count the murders”. I guess that logic can also hold true for Adams-Morgan and gay-bashing. Rule #1: Don’t make the city look bad.

  • Anonymous said:

    Thank you Chris for sharing this. A few things. I don’t know how much they can do (and I’m sure they’ve already been contacted) but there is a DC Office of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Affairs – http://www.lgbt.dc.gov. You can write to them at lgbt@dc.gov. I have, and maybe it could help if others do the same?

    I am a lifelong ally, family member, and friend of the community that finds what happened and our city’s response to be nauseating and unacceptable. I would be happy to help in any way I can. I hope the council members and resources that have been posted can step in, and more importantly step UP. It’s about time, before we’re having this conversation at somebody’s funeral next time.

    Best wishes to Todd and his/your other friends who survived this horrifying attack. I’m by your side and with you in the fight, today and always!

  • Anonymous said:

    A friend recently sent me a link to the original posting and I felt like I wanted to write after reading the post and the comments.

    First, I want to offer and express my sympathy for the victims of this attack and my hopes that they make a speedy physical and psychological recovery.

    Second, I want to join all of those in agreeing that this violence (and any violence for that matter) is simply unacceptable. There is no possible “provocation” to justify this behavior.

    Third, I would like to ask that we really try to avoid making this about race for several reasons.

    I’m African American. Aside from the horseplay in which kids engage, I’ve only been in a physical conflict once in my life. I was attacked in college by some drunken white guy. This guy was shouting all sorts of racist stuff and the campus police actually had to handcuff him to a bed until he calmed down. Luckily, I fended him off. But there I was this short black guy on a very white college campus. And, this incident happened my first semester freshmen year on the hall on which I lived. To this day, I’ve never told my parents about it. I cannot imagine how they would have felt or reacted.

    However, the fact that I was attacked doesn’t mean that all drunken white men are dangerous. Some may be, but all aren’t. This had to do with one individual and if I had labeled every white man a dangerous racist, I wouldn’t have some of the friendships that I have now.

    I also have to take some issue with the points about the troublemakers in Adams Morgan only being black ones. I used to hang out in Adams Morgan from time to time, I don’t much anymore because there are so many drunken people and I don’t feel safe. However during one of those times in particular, I remember actually having to restrain one of the straight white guys who worked at my firm when we were hanging out from starting a fight with some other white guy because this other guy tried to get in front of us in the big-slice pizza line. It was just so stupid. And, no one could believe that he did it front of those of us who were much higher than him in the firm food chain. There was no inkling of this sort of violence would come out when interacting with this kid when he was sober. When I think about his conduct, I think it was about youth, alcohol, and testosterone—not race.

    To me violence is violence. If this discussion turns into black v. gay, I think two very unfortunate things will happen. One, it’s going to be very hard to get support because DC is still a majority black city. Tactically, I’m not sure it is helpful to alienate such a large part of the population. Two, these discussions tend to place those of us that are black and gay in the position of having to chose. And, if I have to choose between which side I am on, I’m going to pick the black side. The discrimination that I’ve faced in my life, the workplace, and in the gay community has almost always come from white people. If things get down to a zero sum game, I know on which side I’ll have to be.

    Let’s not frame the dialogue as us versus them. Let’s make is about us, all of us, taking a stand against violence and ensuring that people can walk the streets of Washington, D.C. safely.

    Lastly, the posts suggest that the DC police are inept an unhelpful. Unfortunately, my experience with them confirms rather than denies this. Aside from all of the other good suggestions about civic engagement, what about some sort of private solution? Businesses often hire their own security. Downtown DC has their golden triangle group of people walking around. I think some sort of presence could help deter crime. Is it possible to get some sort of private security presence? With all the money the gay bars and businesses make, I think they’d have some of the resources to help make this happen. Hell, maybe we call Halliburton and ask them to donate security for good publicity. While I just don’t want to rely on police, I also don’t want to see vigilantism.

  • Megan S. said:

    I posted this following the PDA article, but I think it belongs here too. I don’t have the energy for the whole long saga, but here is the basic story:

    Me and my gf hugged for like a second once in Garfield Park in SE and 2 little girls — 11 or 12ish– started giving us the finger and calling us gay while we continued (ahem) tossing the softball. AND THEN we started to walk home– and small rocks began whizzing past our heads. These KIDS were following 2 grown women and throwing rocks at us. We walked right up to the police station and asked for a cop to talk to the kids, who were still right there. They told us to go home and call 311. And then never came. Turned out the kid lived on my street.

  • J. Matthew said:

    I am deeply saddened to just be reading about this story. I too was a victim of a hate crime a few years ago in Rehoboth Delaware.
    http://www.washblade.com/2004/8-13/news/localnews/gaybash.cfm
    I am not sure if one of the comments above was in reference to my attack but I doubt it. I saw little to no support from the town of Rehoboth. The police did not take any accurate reports the night of the event and did not even arrest them men who attacked me who were wielding tire irons and pipes and the gay community all but turned their backs on me offering no support and issuing statements that Rehoboth was a “family town” and this was “an isolated incident”. Isolated incident? The issue was it was a hate crime incident in a town that thrives all gay tourism and any bad publicity need to be $topped because it would be financially unbeneficial.
    The men were locals with lengthy records and were let go that night since most grew up with the cops. I was from NJ and only in town for 1 night. I was in Ocean City MD the whole week with my sisters and had no problems there, a primarily straight community. I drive to Rehoboth for 1 night and leave the bar with 2 friends and we get followed to our car, harrassed and when we confront them, we are met with weapons that we are not expecting.
    My incident was written off as disorderly conduct between group of drunk men and my lawyer and I had to fight to have the case reopened. Rehoboth did not want this to get public since they knew it would be bad for their gay touri$m. They didn’t want to call it a hate crime, when the only words that came out of the mouth of my attackers were hateful words referencing my sexaulity. The police didn’t even contacted me about the events until a week later and that’s was when they found out that I had broken my jaw in 2 places and lost a tooth. I had my case reopened, only to be met with resistance and few legal options. The men had already pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct and could not be brought up on new charges. I had to give up hopes of a civil case against them since I was not financially able to pursue it and was busy finishing my last year of college. My jaw was wired shut for the first month of classes.
    My only advice I can give these victims is to fight and seek all your options and take any support you can. I had little knowledge of my rights and very few resources. I was also attacked in a state that I was not a resident, so that brought up a whole bunch of other legal and logistical problems.
    My jaw has healed, my tooth has been replaced and I have learned a valuable lesson in all of this. We can not always be on guard to protect ourselves. I am 6′ 7″ 195 lbs and I was attacked by a 5′ 9″ 150lb man and by attacked I mean I was smacked in the mouth with pipe when I turned around to leave the situation. If anyone should feel safe its a man of my size but the hate these men had didn’t see size or shape. They just saw rage and anger for no reason other than I left a bar with my bf hand and hand.
    We can’t live ready to fight but we can be aware or our surrounding and when they unthinkable happens, to not let it get us down and to fight back, legally, verbally and with pride as a community.
    I was only finally able to get some justice with one of my attackers after I was contacted by his X wife who was seeking custody of their kids. One of my attackers had been threatening to kill her, her kids and her new husband and I was able to testify against him and help her get full custody of her kids and leave him with no parental rights. It’s sad to think that if maybe legal action had been taken against him with my “isolated incident” that they might have been able to avoid him threatening the life of his wife and children leading to a lengthy child custody battle.
    My heart and prayers go out to Todd and I think we all need to realize that a lot of the world has mad huge strides as far as acceptance but we are still below the Mason Dixon and sometimes a few of those extreme attitudes come into our gay dc bubble and we need to be prepared.

  • Anonymous said:

    Something really struck me – the police comments on “How to avoid this kind of thing” is total victim blaming. Just like in a lot of rape cases “if she hadn’t been taunting him…if she hadn’t been wearing that…if he had stayed near others” it’s just sick. I understand the idea of keeping yourself safe, but it’s not the victim’s fault, especially in cases of hate crimes or sexual violence.

    It’s also sad, and leads to the whole stigma of hate crimes and sexual violence that it’s not heavily reported in the media. People in Dupont and AdMo may not think hate crimes occur because they tend to be fairly gay friendly neighborhoods, where instead you just get mugged (not that that’s any better, but). People don’t recognize things like this happen everywhere, in “safe” places for gays, or any old person who could suffer from some sort of a crime. People are told to stay away from places that have high media coverage on violence and places that have high word of mouth speculation on violence. People need to know what’s going on, and police need to send out a message that they will prosecute and they will arrest, and they will not stand for violence against people of any kind. I understand people needing to be aware of their surroundings, but that shouldn’t be the only way to avoid being victimized.

  • inked said:

    This is very disturbing. My heart goes out to all of the individuals attacked. I too was once accosted and physically attacked on the street. In my case I was dressed in a suit and on the way to work. It was 7:30 in the morning on a Tuesday. What happened to me was gender based [the perp exposed himself and asked if I liked it], not a gay bashing. It can come out of nowhere. The bruises and swelling take months to heal. My physical injuries were nothing compared to these photos, but it was still terribly hard to look in the mirror everyday and see a face that wasn’t quite my own. I glad to hear that they have made an arrest.

  • inked said:

    While this was does appear to be an attack motivated by the fact that the victim was gay, I like to echo some of the comments above that police response may, or may not be related to the victim’s sexual orientation. When I was attacked [prior to the establishment of the Unified Call Center] there were many problems. Among them was that the operator refuse to send the police because I left the scene of the crime [I climbed into a stranger's car and my attacker chased that car for several blocks trying to convince her to kick me out of the car the whole way]. There were also issues with the police report being incomplete [it was recorded as an aggravated assault, but it should have also been recorded in DC as a sex abuse case].
    One other unrelated comment. I live in an area where I see many transgender youth. I often see them get on the bus in Chinatown and get off in my area. Occasionally my friends and I have seen some of these kids [some can't be over 14] sitting outside early in the morning on Saturday and Sunday still dressed up from clubbing the night before. We’ve wondered if they might have been put out by older guys they stayed with for the night. To the extent that such youth are being allowed into bars / clubs in DC and going home with older guys, this is something that we, as members of gay community in DC, need to step up and examine. If it is happening at all, we need to take steps to stop it, because it is totally unacceptable. These are kids, and they need to be supported and mentored, not exploited.

  • Mr Scruff said:

    I have to second this post – “Arm yourselves, queers, and fight back with deadly force.”

  • Anonymous said:

    Wow…how did they know the couple was gay in the first place? This place doesn’t sound like a gay mecca, so maybe a little prudent behavior (not holding hands, “flouncing”, or kissing each other in public might’ve prevented this. People still aren’t comfortable with such behavior, especially in masculine (mostly middle-lower calss non-white) cultures. In fact, upper-class caucasian neighborhoods are safer for such public displays. You can’t control how people will react to seeing you do such things, but you can control your own actions, and avoid doing such things in front of people that might want to hurt you, not becaus e they fear they may be gay (what a crock), but because a lot of people find the idea repugnant, and get angry and disgusted when they see it (a lot of straight guys grew up with their fathers making deprecating remarks about their masculinity/sexuality when they failed to acheive something physical. I recognize that that has shaped my attitude towards homosexuals, and made me rather cold toward them), and avoiding the trouble that may start. if you “can’t repress who you are” as a lot of homosexual men claim…well, you should be ready for more trouble, because flanting your behavior is what’s setting off the problem. Act with prudency. You are not in your bedroom when you are in public.

  • miss lee said:

    Dear Friend,
    For the past several years domestic violence, crime and terrorism have been on the rise while the feeling of being safe and secure in your home or country has decreased significantly. The time is NOW to start to learn how to protect yourself and not to rely on someone else for your personal safety.

    My name is Lisa McCottry and I own Streetguard Security Products, the web’s best source for security gadgets, suveillance camaras and much, much more. You have found the web’s best source for retail security products, safety products, spy products and electronic gadgets, self defense, personal defense, home security,streetguard, alarms, wireless alarms, spy gadgets, suveillance camaras, safety,stun guns, alarm, pepper, chimes . We stock the best, most effective products, and we strive to provide excellent customer service and and the absolute lowest retail prices. In order to purchase from us you must do so online.

    Who am I? Me, I’m the “underdog” or “the little guy” if you will. The hard-working single mom, dad or couple who believe in the American Dream and really want to get ahead. I also believe that everyone should have a feeling of safety and security in their home whether they are out and about with their family or just relaxing.

    I sell security products because I am a single mother with 2 teenage daughters, and I was also a victim of domestic violence by someone who I thought I knew well and trusted. It really doesn’t matter who is stalking or harrassing you or maybe even threatning your life, you are still left feeling vulnerable, afraid and alone. I started to realize the dangers that faced me everytime I walked down the street or drove in my car. Yes, you can get a protection order from your courthouse but I started to realize that it was just a piece of paper and sometimes that piece of paper is just not enough.

    Streetguard Security Products was cleaverly designed to find ways for people like me and you to protect ourselves without drawing attention to ourself while doing so. I have to admit, because I am a women, that my focus may be set toward women who are victims of rape, violence and domestic issues, but Streetguard Security Products can be used by men who are also victims of domestic violence and other crimes. My Victim’s Advocate once told me that gay men that live with a partner has a higher rate of domestic violence than woman do in similar situations. So I am not bias, I just speak from a woman’s perpective because that is what I am. If you watch the news or read the paper you can see for yourself that there is way to much crime being projected on innocent men, women and children. It does not matter what race you are or what is your sexual preference it is still wrong. I am sorry, the more I write about the lack of security we have the angrier I get just thinking about it.

    So what is the bottom line? If you can relate to what I am saying and feeling, take your time to search my site and order whatever you like. If you have any questions or concerns about the products feel free to call the customer service number at 1-866-220-0272/ 9-5 Est. We will strive to bring you the most innovative products combined with the best customer service available.

    http://www.streetguardsecurityproducts.com

    FYI: I am committed to honoring God in both my personal life and my business dealings. I know the only way to develop long lasting relationships with my customers is by conducting business in a fair and honest manner. Thank you for visiting!

    P.S. It is better to be safe than sorry.

  • miss lee said:

    Dear Friend,
    For the past several years domestic violence, crime and terrorism have been on the rise while the feeling of being safe and secure in your home or country has decreased significantly. The time is NOW to start to learn how to protect yourself and not to rely on someone else for your personal safety.

    My name is Lisa McCottry and I own Streetguard Security Products, the web’s best source for security gadgets, suveillance camaras and much, much more. You have found the web’s best source for retail security products, safety products, spy products and electronic gadgets, self defense, personal defense, home security,streetguard, alarms, wireless alarms, spy gadgets, suveillance camaras, safety,stun guns, alarm, pepper, chimes . We stock the best, most effective products, and we strive to provide excellent customer service and and the absolute lowest retail prices. In order to purchase from us you must do so online.

    Who am I? Me, I’m the “underdog” or “the little guy” if you will. The hard-working single mom, dad or couple who believe in the American Dream and really want to get ahead. I also believe that everyone should have a feeling of safety and security in their home whether they are out and about with their family or just relaxing.

    I sell security products because I am a single mother with 2 teenage daughters, and I was also a victim of domestic violence by someone who I thought I knew well and trusted. It really doesn’t matter who is stalking or harrassing you or maybe even threatning your life, you are still left feeling vulnerable, afraid and alone. I started to realize the dangers that faced me everytime I walked down the street or drove in my car. Yes, you can get a protection order from your courthouse but I started to realize that it was just a piece of paper and sometimes that piece of paper is just not enough.

    Streetguard Security Products was cleaverly designed to find ways for people like me and you to protect ourselves without drawing attention to ourself while doing so. I have to admit, because I am a women, that my focus may be set toward women who are victims of rape, violence and domestic issues, but Streetguard Security Products can be used by men who are also victims of domestic violence and other crimes. My Victim’s Advocate once told me that gay men that live with a partner has a higher rate of domestic violence than woman do in similar situations. So I am not bias, I just speak from a woman’s perpective because that is what I am. If you watch the news or read the paper you can see for yourself that there is way to much crime being projected on innocent men, women and children. It does not matter what race you are or what is your sexual preference it is still wrong. I am sorry, the more I write about the lack of security we have the angrier I get just thinking about it.

    So what is the bottom line? If you can relate to what I am saying and feeling, take your time to search my site and order whatever you like. If you have any questions or concerns about the products feel free to call the customer service number at 1-866-220-0272/ 9-5 Est. We will strive to bring you the most innovative products combined with the best customer service available.

    http://www.streetguardsecurityproducts.com

    FYI: I am committed to honoring God in both my personal life and my business dealings. I know the only way to develop long lasting relationships with my customers is by conducting business in a fair and honest manner. Thank you for visiting!

    P.S. It is better to be safe than sorry.

  • Anonymous said:

    Best thing to do is to get a license to carry a concealed weapon. If you have many attackers with tire irons in the neighborhood, you need more force and protection. I AM NOT GAY BUT STUMBLED ON THIS SITE looking at things regarding Rehoboth Beach. You have a responsibility to protect yourself if law enforcement can not, or will not.

  • Arlington vs Alexandria? - Page 6 - City-Data Forum said:

    [...] home invasions. Typical Brooklynite, defending the floppy fold-over pizza…haha. First of all, not all the victims are drunken idiots. The latter was embedded in the first link I posted. (When I open the second link, I get an article [...]

  • Aran said:

    Hello, good morning Rob, it is pleasure here writing you here. I am glad that this is a good site for us. It is a great site. Rob, a drunkard do not know what they are doing. Of course, he can attack. He does not know what is he doing. He is doped. Ignore him. The best way you can do is not contradict him. Act calm and friendly and nice. Do not contradict. When you contradict, he will not attack you. Be prudent and nice. Comprehend the drunkard. Who knows why the drunkard is like this? Probably he is drunkard because he is gay, maybe he has financial problems, maybe a bad habit, or perhaps he is drunkard because his boyfriend left him for another woman. If you see a drunkard. Please, remain calm and never contradict him and act nice. That’s it. Drunkards will attack you if you offend him by saying, hey, you smell bad, or if you say, poor drunkard with rags clothes, or you stay away or if you contradict him. A drunkard will say things that for example, There is no God. Another example, a drunkard will say, I am gay. He does not know what he says. A white drunkard can say, I am black. Drunkard do not know what he says. I am just giving examples.

  • Aran said:

    Hello, Thai, it is a pleasure meeting you here. Brazil is the most beautiful city in the world. The skins head are not bad. They are normal. They are just like you and me. They are people like you and me and everyone. Something happened between the gays and them. I believe and analyze that gays should behave and respect my white brothers. Okay. That’s it. Gays are not a bad thing. The proverbs is written: Respect that you get respected.

  • Aran said:

    Everywhere is fine. It is okay. I do not find something violent outside. The people are tranquil, okay and fine. Now, what anger are you talking about? Since I do not feel comfortable being around people who are not like me. I want a gay community around in my suburban area. I wish. But, it is okay. It is fine. They are cool people. But, I want a gay community where I can have fun with many guys around me such playing, dancing and having parties. I really, really and really miss the parties. I am afraid to go sometimes far away but I try to remain calm. Since the Proposition 8 was lifted up made me fear to go outside. I used to be in gay and lesbian high school was the best school I have ever met. I was comfortable being in this school. I wish I could go gay and lesbian college. I will be comfortable again. Now, you say about gay bars. I do no go to gay bars. I was told by a lesbian friend that the gay bars are not for me. I wanted to go and she got angry with me and stopped talking to me. She disliked me because I wanted to go to gay bars and she only could go and her friends. I felt sad because I wanted to go to gay bars. I do not know why some people do not want me to go gay bars. It is pretty ironic to me. I used to go just once. When I went to gay bars. I liked the clubs dance but no one asked me to dance. I felt left out. Then, I decided to go to the bath to pee. I was looking for a guy for a simple fuck. But, nothing happened. Then, I pee and the guy came and I was starting to arouse. Ah, my gosh, it was like heaven. I could not retain my erection. There was a very sexy guy in the gay bar. I felt so hot. I was burning and vaporizing and felt so melting like ice. I wanted that so bad this cute guy. The guy left and finished pee. I felt my heart was beating so hard and lots of butterflies. I breathed and was relaxed. You know when you feel sex and you find someone attractive, you feel your heart is pumping and you feel your butterflies and you feel a good erection and vaporozing and melting my body. Whew. I felt so good by looking at this desirable guy. This guy left and then I said: Alas, I lost again. Then, the two guys dressed in black came and asked me what are you doing here, you are not supposed to be here. I told him that I was peeing. He said, okay, I will wait here. Then, I finished and my penis could not pee because I cannot pee when a man is there. It makes me nervous. When I am alone, I can pee easier. But, I forced my penis to pee. I finished it. Then, I left while the guy pressured me to hurry up.Then, I thought, Asshole, idiot, and fat and ugly. But, I did not say anything to him. I left and thought again about the sexy guy who is muscular and the big dick he has had on the packet. I wanted to suck his cock immediately but I lost him and he is gone. Alas, I wanted to suck his cock and enjoy. I felt like a crazy queen, that I was ready to serve the guy. But, no one wanted to ask me to give service. Then, I was seeking for fun. But, I liked the club dance. I like how the crazy queers dance and moved their ass and shake their buns. I could not live without their buns. I wanted to dance with them. I remained there while I met two funny and handsome guys who are one of is a deaf and a hard of hearing. Believe me. It was so fun. They attended me. They talked to me. While the guys lost the track but it was a fun communication that lasted for 2 hours. No one asked to dance or to go for a night. I decided to leave and then the rest that I did is move on. I stood away and left and found the bus station. I felt that I will never find a gay guy. I was thinking what is wrong with me? Maybe I look something that they do not like. Maybe I dress not adequately according to the club dance uniform. I used to be so fat and believe me that I was so fat that I caused to people happy and make them feel funny and play with me and tease me and loved me so much. But, I was a happy fat queen gay. I am still happy. I lost weight and I thought let’s see, I will lose weight and if the gay guys do not still like me. Then, it must be something wrong. Probably, my hearing aid is visible. Maybe, they do not like this hearing aid apparatus. Maybe, they are paranoid of this. Then, maybe I am not their type of guy. I am not the golden nickel. I got to give up. But, I am joking.

  • Aran said:

    I am sorry for your friend, Todd. I suggest you to behave and pretend you are not gay. It is better to be safe. Why will you regret later?

  • Aran said:

    I used to be so effeminate that look like the movies of the princes when they act so effeminated while they eat with a fork and knife on the table with a meat and veggies and a fine glass and a toast bread with butter. I was so effeminate at this time when I was a young. I corrected myself to avoid problems. I was so effeminate not like other effeminate guys. I was an effeminate like a prince. Because I was extremely effeminate. So, I am not anymore. |I pretend I am not effeminate. Just to avoid any problem. Simple.

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