Comments on: Rants: Teacher, There Are Things I Don’t Want To Learn

By: Nathan

Nathan — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 20:41:00 +0000

Stephanie, thanks for saying exactly what I was thinking but couldn’t communicate effectively! Amen…

By: stephanie

stephanie — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 19:59:00 +0000

In the summer, one of my advisers told me that the reason she wasn’t out to her students was because it would have been too much of a distraction. I didn’t really understand it at the time, but now that is exactly how I see it. I am not out at school for the same reasons that I am not “out” to people in many other situations – I don’t want to be shoved into the gay box. It’s not that I’m embarrassed to be gay, but I just don’t want people to see me approaching and think: GAY, GAY, GAY. The unfortunate reality is that being gay is still a huge novelty –for lack of a better word – in our society; I still catch myself categorizing, or at least thinking about, friends by their sexuality. Just like in all other realms of my life, I would hate to become the “gay teacher” instead of being the funny teacher, the caring teacher, or even just the social studies teacher.

Still, though, I grapple with the social impacts of not just being “loud and proud” with my students, especially for the ones whose gay futures I can foresee better than they themselves. Instead, I have become accustomed to just laughing off all inquiries into the personality and looks of my boyfriend, because telling middle schoolers that you don’t have a boyfriend is about as easy and successful as telling them that body splash really doesn’t provide the pleasant nasal sensations that they think it does.

By: Jenny Miller

Jenny Miller — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 14:31:00 +0000

I’m pretty sure this is why I keep putting off going into teaching. Which sucks, because my (closeted) gay teachers were really helpful, too. I taught for 2 years at an elementary school, was out to staff but not kids, and I know the little future queers of american there loved me.

By: Nathan

Nathan — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 14:24:00 +0000

Thanks so much for posting this. It is very apropos for a situation I am dealing with right now. I am an administrator at a Jewish religious school and oversee a program for 7th-12th graders. I never quite thought of myself as closeted, since my ex-partner used to work with me and we were out as a couple to the whole staff, but it was different with the kids.

He (thankfully) no longer works here, but I am still queer...haha.

I was asked to present to our Confirmation class about faith and homosexuality, since I am a trained speaker on the subject and a professional educator. After about a week of internal debate, I ended up declining because I did not feel comfortable with what might happen when parents found out or if the kids told their younger siblings. The presentation would be to 10th graders. I feel kinda chicken shit.

It is hard to navigate this. I won't lose my job as the clergy is openly supportive...it is more a question of comfort. I said no but I am still torn...

So, it runs deeper for some then just whether the job is lost. It is a big thing to take on for oneself. Thanks again for writing this!