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7 April 2008, 4:32 pm No Comments

Sports: Ballin’ Girls


Women are still playing basketball, and some small segment of the population is still caring. Let’s haphazardly review the women’s Final Four from a TNG perspective:

  • Geno Auriemma and the Evil UConn Empire are OUT. But we’ll still get to watch their freak of a freshman Maya Moore for another three years, cuz this ain’t the men’s game.
  • Tara VanderVeer and the Standford Cardinal are IN. VanderVeer is the lesbian coach most cited in the gay-smearing recruting wars. Represent, Tara! But consider a 21st century lesbian makeover. I know coaches are too busy to feed or dress themselves, but think about it in the offseason. In other Stanford news, star Candice Wiggins (high-fiving cheerleader at right) is cute.

  • Poor LSU lost in the Final Four AGAIN. They are officially the Buffalo Bills of the NCAA. You may remember LSU from the Pokey Chatman “scandal” of a couple years back, wherein she was canned for pokin’ a former player. I don’t wanna sound too pervy, but, those kids are more than of age. As for Pokey, she’s been sentenced to coaching in Russia.
  • (Not) Gay New Divorcée and Queen of Basketball Pat Summitt is IN, even though Tennessee’s badass star Candace “The One Who Can Dunk” Parker has been playing with a separated shoulder. Candace’ll be the first pick in this year’s WNBA draft, going to L.A., and she was one of People Magazine’s Most Beautiful People, which means she must really love fiancé Shelden Williams —>

Who will be the champeens? Tune in for Stanford vs. Tennesse, tomorrow night at 8:30 on ESPN.


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  • coach said:

    pat summitt is divorced! i just recently found out she was “married”. also, can we do some sort of chess set with head coaches and assistant coaches. the asst coaches are really repping super cuts and high waistbands.
    my money’s on the lady volunqueers–i heart hornbuckle & parker.
    is nelly’s showin the game?

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

  • adam isn't here said:

    i don’t give a shit about womyn’s basketball (or any other basketball) but thanks for the link to that wapo story. good to get the blood boiling early in the day.

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