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14 January 2008, 6:25 pm 14 Comments

Uncategorized: Craigslist Love?


I’m well aware that Craigslist is not the best place to be looking for love, but sometimes I can’t help myself. If I meet a lesbian I’m interested in, it’s a rare occasion — all the good ones really do seem to be taken, or live outside the District — so sometimes I wander on the site to see if my dream girl is out there, using the Internet to locate me.

A friend and I are wasting time at work by looking up w4w ads in our respective locations (D.C. and Maine) and sending them to each other. What I learned — D.C. Craigslist is a place to troll for meaningless hookups, while my dream women reside in Portland, Maine.

Take, for example, this 24-year-old Portland girl: “About me: I work in the arts and am very passionate about my job. In my free time, I like to take walks (especially in the snow!), watch films, and read. When I get the chance I like going to indie concerts in town. I am a reliable person, but know how to have fun. I like going out and staying in. To me, a good night could be curling up in a warm blanket with a movie and a good pizza or going to hear a band play.” Let’s contrast that with a 19-year-old D.C. poster: “i love to eat…ill host or u can host it doesnt matter…im white 5’6..110 lbs..34c..shaved…please reply with pic!!!”


Here’s another from D.C.: “5’3 170lbs chocolate lady that is attached but looking 4 Friends with Ben…Must be easy on the eyes, discreet, freaky, clean, drama-free, and disease free. I am very oral. must be available in the mornings. Need someone experienced cause I’m shy but I can get the job done. Hit me up MUST have pics for a response.”

And another Portland girl: “I am single and in my mid-twenties. I am cute and more on the femme side of things. Love to have fun and meet new interesting people places and things. I am on the down slope of my club phase, but I can still rock it;) Dancing and music is a huge plus. Museums and art galleries are a definite. Love to visit pubs, coffee shops and all other places where good conversation can be had. Appreciate those who volunteer or have a sense of humanitarianism.”

And I’m not just pulling the exceptions — it seems like as a rule, D.C. Craigslist w4w is horrifying — incorrect grammar and spelling, abbreviations, naked photos, and a lack of interest for anything outside of sex. The few normal sounding posts are from women not interested in someone as young as I am (I’m very mature, I swear). If I’m actually looking for a normal date, where can I look?

So, some questions: Do people actually reply to these posts? Wouldn’t this be an easy way to pick up some STDs? Is it expecting too much to have normal women using Craiglist? Or should I sign up for Match.com?


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14 Comments »

  • Ben said:

    Wow. I love this. I feel that I have no real understanding of what it’s like to be a lesbian, particularly a new gay one. The gay and lesbian communities are so segregated in DC that even the sterotypes, which is all I have to rely on, seem poorly outlined. Posts like this intrigue me.

    I never thought that lesbians might find the same kind of relational patterns on craigs list that the gays do. I’ve never thought about it. I’m particularly curious about the distinctions you made. Is there really something to be said about lesbian relational patterns in urban/rural settings, or is it more about the cultures unique to the two places you mentioned? Can the same be said for gays? Curious if you’ve thought about that.

  • karl jones said:

    having moved from arkansas to dc seven years ago, i have to say that i was surprised to meet a new kind of lesbian i’d never encountered before (republican power lesbians) and that seems to be very specific to dc. all the lesbians i knew in arkansas had organic gardens, baked pies and ran their own grassroots non-profit organizations….and would shimmy shimmy at the one lesbian bar every once in a while.

    my guess is that these larry craig power lesbians might be the ones behind all the less-than attractive CL postings. most of the lesbians i’ve met in dc who are super sex-positive are of the literati/michelle tea set, not the anon shaved discreet kind. i meet all my favorite lesbians at places like music shows, fem. conferences and places like eagle dyke night and guerilla queer bar (shameless plug)…oh, and through straight people. lesbians seem much better than gay men in dc at befriending and maintaining strong relationships with straight people.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • adam isn't here said:

    wha? i have lots of straight friends. no lesbians since i moved to DC though. honestly, i haven’t even met any here. so sorry ms. c, i have no advice apart from this: if dykes are anything like fags, craigslist seems like a terrible place to meet people. that said, i met my boyfriend at a gay sauna and we’ve been together for three years with no sign of trouble. go figure.

    also, while portland might be removed from the “center of the universe” (a.k.a. the east coast from boston to DC)i hardly think it qualifies as rural.

  • dcreverend said:

    My favorite part of the DC lesbo action on Craig’s List has to be the “missed connections.” Here you can see where people are actually checking each other out – the Metro, WNBA games, coffe shops. Also you know when a party gets hot cause there’s always posts here afterwards!

  • Leonida said:

    Leonida…

    The New Gay » Uncategorized: Craigslist Love?…

  • Chana Bonyai said:

    Useful info. Lucky me I discovered your website accidentally, and I’m shocked why this coincidence didn’t took place earlier! I bookmarked it.

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