(This is the fourth in my ongoing series of Chanukah posts on the gay Jewish experience. I would really, really love to get a women’s or transgendered voice in these, so if you are either and have something you want to share on the queer Jewish experience, please contact me at Zack@thenewgay.net)

In yesterday’s Chanukah post I alluded to bagel chasers, men who actually go out of their way to hit on, pick up or sleep with Jewish guys. As a Jewish guy, I find this to be utterly baffling. To answer the question of “why me?” I turned to longtime TNG commentor Parker. Here’s what he had to say:

Am I a bagel chaser? Alas, I am. It’s a problem, but it doesn’t present itself through long night staking out synagogues or anything. It just happens.

Here’s the deal. There have been a handful of guys over the years that have gotten me into trouble. And by trouble I mean making out or aggressively flirting with them when the bf isn’t looking. In one instance, I kinda accidentally had sex with one of these gentlemen when I kinda maybe wasn’t allowed to. Anyway, there was something about these guys that made them physically irresistible. I found out later that they were all Jewish and that I definitely had a “type.”

What does this mean? Nothing, really. My boyfriend of nearly seven years is a half Thai, half Tennessee Nazarene Buddhist. Nothing Jewish about him at all. But I do still find myself hopelessly drawn to guys who wind up being Jewish. I have two theories as to why:

1) I am totally hot for that guy Dave Lieberman from Food TV and am looking for anyone who looks even the slightest bit like him. (Or that knows him. Jews all know each other, right?) [Ed. Note: We do. Its called "Jewish Geography."]

2) I am seeking out people who look like they’re from the part of the world I’m from (lots of Italians and Jews in the Philadelphia area) so that there’s some chance that I could talk to them about the Philadelphia Eagles . . . while making out with them.

Whatever it is, it’s gotten to the point where the Jews are now coming after me. Just recently, a hot Israeli guy told me he wanted to do all kinds of naughty things to me. I think he changed his mind when he found out I wasn’t Jewish myself but, before he found out that my mother’s Italian heritage was the reason for my dark curly hair, he was totally giving me the sex eye. So maybe I’m into the Jews because the Jews are into me because they think I’m a Jew?

How Meta! Personally, I’m just excited to find out that, against all odds, this nose and hair could actually make me exotic.