Musings on Dildos
Last night I attended a sex toy party (well, more accurately it came to me, since my roommate threw it for her birthday). It was basically what I expected – 50 types of perfumey creams that do everything from setting your nipples on fire to suppressing a gag reflex (though this just resulted in a group conversation about how I don’t have a gag reflex and how that’s not fair because I don’t give blowjobs), 8 kinds of vibrators (some of these were pretty cute, with little animals taking care of the clit part — now that I write this it actually sounds gross), and a variety of outfits that look like something from a Halloween store.
When it was my turn to go meet with the sex goddess, as we called her, I told her that I sleep primarily with women, and was there anything special that I could get? Her response: there was one double-ended dildo, which apparently has a ridiculous girth (No thank you. It was also tan and resembled a worm), a strap-on that she didn’t even have with her, and that was it. There were items designed to use on women that I could obviously get, but I wanted something that could be used together, like the double-ended dildo (though why I’m even thinking about getting something like that without a girlfriend is beyond me). The vast majority of the items were for heteros (though I’m going to give the sex goddess credit — when she was doing her spiel, she never made the assumption that everyone was straight).
But it was pretty disappointing that there weren’t more lezzie toys and that got me thinking that someone should specialize in lesbian sex toy parties — it would be nice if someone would come to your house, bring a bunch of toys geared towards lesbian sex, and discuss how to deal with things like lesbian bed death.
The sex toy party also resulted in a long conversation amongst my friends about what makes a good dildo. I explained that I want my dildos to look absolutely nothing like a penis, and would prefer them to be pink, maybe with sparkles, and have a cute name, while my straight friends prefer them to look and feel like penises, veins and all (and typing that sounds gross too).
Does anyone out there know good places to get sex toys for lesbians? Or homos in general?
I fucking love you, Amy.
I pulled up google to find “lesbian sex toys”, but since I’m at work, I thought better of it.
Yes! There’s a new store called Sugar in Baltimore (sugartheshop.com) and they will send their team of lesbian & trans friendly sex toy specialists to your house for a SugarWare party (if a drive to Bmore is out of your range).
SugarShop? Sweet! And their place looks like a dungeon.
Well now I know what I’ll be doing for my birthday party!
Good Vibrations (http://www.goodvibes.com) based out of San Francisco (of course!) has a great selection of non-penile sex toys. This one is even pink! Sadly they won’t come and throw a sex party at your house, but it’s a great resource for finding toys that don’t remind you why you don’t like dick.
And if you’re ever in SF, Berkeley or Brookline, Mass., it’s a great place to just walk in and snoop around. It’s like A Clean Well Lit Place For Sex Toys.
BABELAND! My favorite sex toy shop ever. They are lesbian owned and have all sorts of workshops and gatherings. Yes, I vote for babeland every day of the week. xo
I share your lament!! I do toy parties in the DC area focused on lesbians and enhancing sexual connection between women (and I am queer myself). I’d be glad to help out! Email me and we can talk more about it. mpassionedparties@yahoo.com.
Babeland is in New York but worth the trip. It is a shop for women owned by women and very queer friendly. I bought a pink sparkly strap-on harness, and they sell dildos that do not resemble gross veiny penises.
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